In his very excellent book, The Power of Habit, Charles Duhigg makes a compelling case that some habits are more important than others. He calls these keystone habits which “can influence how people work, eat, play, live, spend, and communicate.” Adopting a keystone habit can start a process that has the potential to transform our lives. When we embrace these habits, everything else starts to shift. This is true of large companies. It is also true of families and individuals.
Eating dinner together every evening, for example, tends to lead to better academic skills, which leads to higher grades, which grows emotional control, which builds self-confidence, which can lead to better college options, which can generate improved career options, which can impact the rest of the individual’s future.
Exercise is another habit choice that sets off chain reactions in every other area of our existence. Suddenly other hard choices become easier. People start eating better, becoming more productive at work, smoke less, are more financially responsible, and feel calmer. Unfortunately, most cultures (family or business) just grow with no planning at all and develop into something less than they could be.
Establishing an intentional family culture is basically making a thoughtful choice about which values we hold dear and which habits we adopt. Then, we systematically set up the routines, the boundaries, and the reward structures to help the transformation along. Strong families do the hard work early to allow their kids to thrive in the present and grow into their glorious future.
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